A weblog of romance and madness

Month: July 2015

I made a flower weep today.   May the blossoms never forgive me

Sorry 🙁

incoherent thoughts

I was at office, talking to my colleague over Skype. He was sitting only a couple of rows away from me. But if you think about it, the conversation which originated from me probably went through numerous encodings, hopped on telephone lines, passed through deep sea cables, traveled through satellites and traveled all the way around the world before it finally reached my colleague, who was sitting just a couple of meters away from me. Behind their facades of simplicity, everything in life is complex at the magnitude of a comet hitting a flying fuck.

On the last day of college, I met everyone and exchanged good byes and wishes for future, along with tear soaked promises to meet again. But little did I realize then the finality of the farewells we bid. In the last five years since college, I haven’t met more than a dozen of them. So it is likely that on that farewell day, I met most of my friends for the very last time in my life, without realizing the finality of the moment at that time. I often wonder what I would have done or said differently, had I known. When I took one last look through my hotel room window before vacating it, I didn’t realize it then that I will never ever stand there and look through that window again – not again for a gazillion years stretching between that moment and infinity. Every passing moment has a finality to it. It takes with it something from us that we’ll never ever have again.

I had a full meal the night before my entrance examination, and as a result I felt sleepy afterwards and went to bed early without covering as much topic as I wanted to. This in turn had some effect on the marks I scored in the examination on the next day. The marks decided which college and course I got admission to. I met most of my friends at the college, and the person I’m now and the things I’ll ever do are influenced by the college, and the folks I met there. So, if you think about it, my decision to eat a full supper that day had as much effect as anything else in shaping up the person I’ll ever be and the things I’ll ever do. Everything you do, or don’t, will start chain reactions of earth shattering magnitudes, adding to the entropy of the universe, which in turn changes everything that will ever happen. Or not.

I own nothing.

Not even myself. We are all borrowed sets of particles that have existed in the universe since always, to infinity.